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by orphan_account



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe- No Supernatural, F/F, Other, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-30
Updated: 2017-04-16
Packaged: 2018-09-20 19:50:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 16,936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9510359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Laura is back in town after losing her job, Carmilla is restoring an old house, and newly-engaged Lafontaine and Perry have decided to start a weekly game night.**Due to circumstances, this will, unfortunately, remain unfinished. Sorry. This was a personal story for me that got closer to things than I anticipated. Thank you all for reading. This is a lovely community.





	1. Exposition

**Author's Note:**

> First attempt at the whole fic thing. Constructive feedback and comments are appreciated. Updates will be irregular.

**\- Laura -**

Laura and Gus eyed one another from across the counter. They had come to something close to an unspoken agreement. Neither one liked the other, but they would tolerate each others existence, for now. The need for a peaceful workday temporarily outweighed her desire to pursue her vendetta. But Laura would keep vigilant. She hadn't forgotten what had happened on her first shift last month, and she was sure Gus hadn't either.

"Laura! Can I get a little help?" Laura's dad asked.

"Oh! Sorry Dad!" Laura replied as she hurried around the counter to pull open the door for her father, his hands full carrying cans of paint.

"Thanks, Sweetheart. I've got to go deliver these to Mr. Goldsmith. I should be back in 20 minutes. You're in charge til then."

Laura's eyes rolled slightly. "Haha, Dad. Who else would be? Gus?"

Mr. Hollis gave his daughter a small smile. "Hey, now. Technically he _does_ have seniority over you." He leaned in closer, his smile disappearing. "You remember where the bear mace is in case of emergencies, right?"

Laura turned away from her father so he wouldn't see her much larger eye roll. "Yes, Dad. Taped under the counter, where it's always been." She began walking back to her previous post.

"Okay. Just making sure. You can never be too careful. I love you." Laura's dad replied as he left the store.

"Love you too." Laura said softly as she rounded the counter and sat on her stool. The door was already closed so it was unlikely that her dad had heard her.

She sighed, putting her hand under her chin as her arm leaned against the counter. Laura did a quick sweep of the area and noticed that Gus was no longer where he had been. Laura's heartbeat tripled, and she took a frantic look around. She caught a glimpse of Gus' tail as he walked down an aisle. She took a deep breath to try to get herself under control. That fracking cat would be the end of her. She just knew it. Laura's attention shifted as the bell above the door rang and a customer walked in. Laura recognized the cute blonde as she had been a frequent patron over the past month.

"Hi, Elsie. Back for more sandpaper?" Laura asked.

"Hey, Laura. No, thank God. I don't know how much more of that I could have taken. Now we're on to staining." Elsie replied.

"Cool. Um, I think that's Aisle 3." Laura said. "Watch out for Gus. Last I saw him he was heading that way."

Elsie chuckled at Laura's warning. "Thanks. I don't know why you're so paranoid about him. He's a big softie."

"After tripping over him three times in one day you'd be paranoid too." Laura called to Elsie's retreating back.

As Elsie headed down Aisle 3, Laura thought back to her first day at work. Well, her first day _this_ time around. She was no stranger to working the counter for her dad's hardware store, but that had been when she was in high school. Now she was back, like most of the last decade hadn't happened. She _had_ been following her dream; getting her Journalism degree, interning at a fairly respected newspaper, and working her way up the ranks to the point where she got to write articles with her name in the byline and everything. Then it turned out the CFO had been embezzling like crazy, and the place went under. Laura lost her job and, in a moment of panic and homesickness, had accepted her father's suggestion that she move back home for a little while. To get herself "back on her feet".

On her return, she found herself a nemesis in Gus. Her dad, likely suffering from Empty Nest Syndrome, found the stray under the dumpster one cold fall morning, and adopted the monster. Now he was Hollis Hardware's mascot, with a little box on the front counter and everything. Laura had tried to play nice. She loved animals. Gus didn't seem to love her though. He hissed at her when she first tried to pet him, and then he followed up that apparent assault on his honour by waiting until Laura was carrying something heavy or fragile and tripping her. Three times. She complained to her dad as she was been questioned about her "carelessness", and he took Gus' side! After that Laura channeled her inner Mad-Eye and kept _constant vigilance_. Although, technically that had been Barty Crouch Jr. impersonating Mad-Eye. Whatever. Either way Laura was not letting that little sphinx best her ever again.

Elsie pulled Laura from her reverie as she placed her purchases on the counter. Laura handled some small talk as she rang Elsie up. She liked the blonde woman. She wasn't really Laura's type, but Elsie wasn't on the market anyway. Laura knew a fair bit about her from Elsie's frequent trips to the store. Laura had been, no, _was_ a journalist for a reason. Elsie and her girlfriend (What had the girlfriend's name been? Carmen? Whatever.) were trying their hand at flipping a house that the girlfriend's grandmother had willed to her. Elsie was a bartender at the Lustig and what's-her-name worked in a lab. She finished up and handed Elsie her bag, waving goodbye as she left. Glancing at the clock, Laura saw that it was almost noon. She hopped off the stool to grab her lunch from the fridge. She made especially sure always to keep her eyes on the ground ahead of her.

   **\- LaFontaine -**

Everything was perfect. They knew that. They had been planning this for months. There was no inclement weather. They'd tested the paint too many times to count. That was a lie. It was six times. They'd even made up some pesticide signs to keep people off the grass. They had borrowed the set of glasses from work. Well, borrowed without asking. But no one would know. And it had to be tonight. Darwin knew it took far too long for all the variables to fall in line. Everything was perfect. They knew that. They had been planning this for months...

"Sweetie, how long until I can open my eyes?" Perry asked, interrupting the repeating internal monologue LaFontaine was using to psyche themselves up.

"Oh, right. Um, just a bit longer." Laf replied, taking both of Perry's hands in theirs.

They guided Perry close to the edge of the roof and slipped on the glasses just once more to make sure everything was perfect. It would be. They were wearing their lucky suspenders and Perry's favourite bow tie. They took off the glasses and regretfully let go of Perry's hand.

"You can open them now." LaFontaine said.

Perry opened her eyes. They were on the roof of their apartment building. It wasn't very high, only being four storeys. It did provide a fantastic view of the park across the street though. She took in the view, and then her gaze settled on LaFontaine. She raised one of her eyebrows inquisitively, but otherwise just smiled at them. Laf got a little lost in her eyes until she cleared her throat.

"Oh, Mendel! Right. Here." they said, handing her the glasses.

Perry took the glasses and put them on, never taking her eyes off LaFontaine. Laf gestured for her to take in the view once more. Once they were certain that Perry's focus was off them, they carefully took out the box from their pocket and stealthily dropped to one knee. They were really hoping the bio-luminescent paint they had created would capture Perry's attention. On the park across the way Laf had mapped out the ideal layout to paint their message of "Lola Perry, Will You Marry Me?".

Perry was taking in the skyline, and then she tilted her head down and saw the message. At least, that was what Laf assumed was happening when they heard her gasp. Perry turned hard towards them and saw the ring. She brought one hand up to her dropped jaw, her other one slowly taking the glasses off her face. Laf tried to memorize Perry's face at that exact moment. They wanted to be able to play it back over and over.

Laf had just enough time to register a blur of red curls streaming towards them before being crushed in a fierce embrace. They let out a small internal groan when they heard a snapping sound behind them. But their focus quickly shifted to Perry repeatedly whispering "Yes" in their ear.

   **\- Carmilla -**

Carmilla looked at LaFontaine with a cocked eyebrow. "There's no way that's the end of the story." she said.

"Hey, we're at work. Gotta keep it PG." Laf replied, shrugging.

Carmilla rolled her eyes as she leaned back in her chair, putting her feet up on her desk right beside where LaFontaine was perched.

"Yes, because I crave all the sordid details of ginger-on-ginger loving. Come on, what did she think of the ring?" she asked.

Carmilla had a vested interest, as Laf had roped her into helping with the ring purchase. It had taken her two weeks to talk LaFontaine out of smelting the ring themselves. As nice as the thought and effort would have been, Laf was just too accident prone to allow them around molten metal.

"She loved it. She said it was 'Simple and Elegant'. Just what she wanted." they answered.

"So... you're welcome! And what did Beth say about the glasses?" she asked.

"The cost is coming out of my pay. But, totally worth it." they replied, a goofy grin taking over their face.

"Ginger-on-ginger action was that good, huh?" Carmilla asked right before LaFontaine threw a book at her from her desk.

"Shut up!" Laf tried to be angry through their laughter. "You can't be making those kinds of comments when you come over Friday."

"Ugh. Explain to me again why I'm giving up my freedom to spend even more time with you." she said, flipping open her book and pretending to read.

"Now that we're _engaged_ , Perr wants to make sure we don't get wrapped up in wedding planning and become one of _those_ couples. So she's establishing a weekly game night to make sure we don't 'abandon our friends'." they responded.

"And why can't you just make due with Beefcake or Xena?" Carmilla asked.

"Because neither of them can commit to it fully. _Kirsch_ is coaching Zeta little league football, and _Danny_ 's Summer Society girls usually have plans most weekends." LaFontaine answered.

"And you think _I'm_ not busy Friday nights?" she questioned.

"Are you?" LaFontaine asked.

"...No." Carmilla sighed.

"Great! Oh, and feel free to bring Elsie." LaFontaine said.

"Hmmm. Probably won't be doable. She works nights most weekends." Carmilla said.

"Well, that sucks." LaFontaine said, sympathy clear in their tone.

"Yeah, it's not fantastic...” Carmilla trailed off, not really wanting to discuss it. “Wait. Please tell me that I'm not going to be a third wheel for the wonder twins." she pleaded.

"Har har. Don't worry. An old friend of Perry's moved back to town recently. I went to college with her too, but Perr's known her forever. She'll be coming too." they said.

"Well, thank Cthulhu for small miracles." she replied.

"Crap. Beth is coming. I gotta get back on her good side. See you later." Laf half whispered before rushing off.

Carmilla shook her head as she also got back to work. She wondered if this "old friend" would turn out to be a redhead too. They seemed to attract one another in her experience. 


	2. Introduction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stir-fry and Settlers of Catan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the comments and kudos. They're keeping me motivated. Apologies if you're unfamiliar with Settlers of Catan. I may have gotten a little too into the play-by-play.

**\- Carmilla -**

Carmilla let out a heavy sigh as she opened her front door after work. She had noticed herself becoming anxious whenever she came home over the past couple of months. She had her suspicions about what the cause was, but she just kept shoving the feeling back down as best she could. She'd deal with it. Eventually.

"Hey Blondie, I'm home." she called out, putting her keys on their hook.

"Hey Babe. Just got out of the shower. If you'd been a little quicker you could have joined me..." Elsie replied beyond their bedroom door.

"And let dinner get cold?" she called back, walking over to the stove. She took the lid off the wok to see that Elsie had made chicken stir-fry.

Carmilla heard the bedroom door open while she was smelling the food. Elsie brushed Carmilla's hair away from her neck and lightly kissed her jaw.

"We do have a working microwave, you know." Elsie whispered into her ear before playfully biting her earlobe.

"Not really in the mood, Goldilocks." Carmilla said, moving away from Elsie to grab some plates from the cupboard. "Tired from work."

Elsie sighed and grabbed a couple of forks and napkins to set the table. "Fine." she responded.

The two women spent most of the meal looking at their phones. There was a brief conversation about their respective days, but once that topic ended nothing else took its place. Carmilla started cleaning up and Elsie went to put on her makeup and get ready for work. Carmilla finished cleaning up and hopped in the shower to get ready to go to Laf and Perry's. She was midway through when Elsie opened the bathroom door to poke her head in.

"I'm heading to work." Elsie said.

"K. You taking the car?" Carmilla asked.

"No. A few of us are gonna hang out after work. I'll get a ride home."

"K. Be safe... Love you."

"...Bye..." Elsie said as she closed the door.

Carmilla let out the breath she hadn't realized she was holding in. She leaned her head against the cool shower wall and stood under the spray until the water turned cold.

**\- Laura -**

Laura knew she was early as she pulled into the parking lot of Perry and Laf's apartment building. She wasn't overly concerned though. Perry had probably been ready for a whole half hour at this point. Plus she wanted some time with just the three of them to catch up. It had been way too long.

She jumped out of the car and hustled into the lobby. She had forgotten to ask which apartment was theirs. She thought about texting them, but wanted to surprise them. Well, as much as you could surprise someone expecting you. It took a little while to find their names beside 307. She hit the button.

"Hello?" LaFontaine asked through the intercom.

"It's Laura!" Laura exclaimed, unable to contain her enthusiasm.

"Frosh! I'll buzz you in." Laf said.

Two minutes later Laura was hugging the Hufflepuff out of her official (and unofficial) former floor dons. Laf took her coat, while Perry guided her to the table. Laura's eyes widened at the large plate of brownies at its center. Laura consumed chocolatey heaven as Perry asked her how the past month back home had been. How was work? How was her dad? Laura filled the couple in while doing her best not to talk with her mouth full. It had been over a year since she'd had Perry's baking, and she'd forgotten how fracking _good_ it was.

Laura inquired about how Laf and Perry were doing. Perry was slowly taking on more responsibilities at her mother's bakery, as her mom was retiring in the next five years. Laf was second-in-command at the biology lab in town. They mostly handled water samples from local wells, but every once in a while something interesting would come in that would keep them occupied for a few weeks.

As Laf went on spouting science jargon, Laura took her eyes on a quick tour of the apartment. Open floor plan, two bedrooms (one being used as Perry's office), one bathroom, modest kitchen. The walls were covered with pictures of friends and family, as well as a couple of scientific diagrams that Laura didn't even want to try to decipher. As her eyes drifted back to the (now almost empty) plate of brownies, they passed over Perry's hands.

"Oh my Dumbledore! Your ring! I totally forgot! Let me see!" Laura squealed, uncontrollably bouncing in her seat as she interrupted LaFontaine's tale of the (most likely not) sentient yogurt.

Perry granted Laura's request, scooting her chair closer so she didn't have to reach across the table. As Laura was closely inspecting the ring, the intercom buzzed. Laf walked over to answer.

"Hello?" they asked.

"Hey Frankenstein." a low voice replied.

"Hey Broodzilla. Come on up." Laf responded as they pushed the buzzer for five seconds.

"Sorry, Laura. I've got to take my hand back." Perry said, gently slipping her hand from Laura's grasp. "I need to replenish the brownies."

Laura wasn't quite finished admiring the ring, but more brownies was a solid consolation.

"Nicely done on the ring, Laf." Laura said.

"Well, I can't take all the credit. Carmilla did lend a hand." they replied as there was a knock at the door. "That'll be her now."

Carmilla. The name sounded familiar to Laura. But she couldn't quite place it. Perry headed over beside LaFontaine to greet the new arrival.

"Okay, Pepper Ann. There's no need for this kind of behaviour." Carmilla said as she was given a friendly hug from Perry.

"Don't be silly." Perry admonished as she released Carmilla. "Now, Carmilla, this is Laura. Laura, Carmilla."

"Hi!" Laura said, as she gave a smile and little wave.

"Hey." Carmilla replied with a smirk and a slight nod.

Laura looked Carmilla over as she placed her leather jacket and messenger bag on the back of the chair to Laura's right. She was short, but taller than Laura. Which didn't mean much because Laura had met 12-year-olds taller than her. Black hair, done up in a loose bun, dark eyes, pale skin. She was wearing a black tank top and black jeans. Her most eye-catching feature, though, was definitely her tattoo sleeves. Laura spotted a raven, a skull, a cat, and a few lines of writing. She was having trouble making out exactly what they said when a loud cough made her aware of her surroundings once more.

Laura looked up to find all three of them regarding her. Her brain started working overtime for something, anything to say to relieve the awkwardness. Then it hit her.

"Carmilla! You must be Elsie's girlfriend!" Laura exclaimed, _really_ hoping that Carmilla was as unique of a name as she thought it was.

Laura thought she saw Carmilla momentarily stiffen at the mention of her girlfriend's name. But, then again, maybe not.

"Must I be?" Carmilla asked as she took a bottle and a can out of her bag. She headed over to the kitchen and took a glass from the cupboard as well.

"Don't mind Grumpypants, Laura. She takes awhile to warm up to strangers." Laf stage whispered.

"I'm barely lukewarm with you, Freckleface." Carmilla retorted as she opened the fridge. "Where are the limes? You said you were picking up limes after work."

"They're in the bottom right drawer." Perry answered.

"Hello, Beautiful." Carmilla said as she closed the fridge, lime in hand. She quickly cut it into quarters.

"Carmilla used to bartend, so she takes her alcohol _very_ seriously." Laf teased.

"Oh yeah? Was it a biker bar?" Laura joined in.

Carmilla finished squeezing the lime into her drink and turned to look at Laura. Laura held her gaze, wondering if she had gone too far. It was just with all the black, the tattoos, and the leather, it wasn't a crazy leap to make. But Laura was getting progressively more nervous the longer Carmilla looked at her. It felt like Carmilla was just noticing her for the first time. And, intrigued, was studying her intensely with a slight tilt to her head. Laura finally broke the connection and looked down at the brownie in her hand. Carmilla came back to her seat next to Laura.

"Strip club, actually." Carmilla calmly answered.

Laura felt herself blushing and bent her head so her increasingly red face was hidden by her hair.

"So!" Perry said, clapping her hands to break the tension. "What game do we want to play first?"

**\- Carmilla -**

"Anybody have any wood?" Perry asked, looking around the table.

"Man, we definitely can't play this when Kirsch is here. He'd be giggling every time someone mentioned wood." Laf said.

"I'll trade you wood for a sheep." Laura answered.

"Deal!" Perry exclaimed, exchanging cards with Laura, then building a road.

Carmilla had actually done fairly well so far tonight. This was their fourth game of Settlers, and she had won the first two. She just had to keep an eye on the _betrothed_. They were a little too lenient with their trades with each other.

Perry passed Carmilla the dice. She rolled a 7.

"Crap." Laf said, counting eight cards in their hand. "Now how am I gonna build a city?"

Carmilla picked up the robber from the desert and studied the board. Perry was currently leading, but Laura had just made a trade for a sheep. A sheep she wanted. She must have been fairly buzzed, as she decided to play nice and put the robber on Laura's least useful resource.

"Hey! Perry's winning!" Laura pouted.

"Not necessarily!" Perry replied. "LaFontaine has three development cards."

"Whoa! So not cool." Laf responded.

"I want your sheep, Little Bo-Peep." Carmilla rhymed. Okay, maybe she was beyond buzzed.

"Well, I'd say good luck, but I wouldn't mean it." Laura said as she spread her cards face down on the table, waiting for Carmilla to take one.

Carmilla picked the one on Laura's far right. It was an ore.

"Ha! I didn't even need that one." Laura said with a smug smile on her face.

Carmilla contemplated her next move. She had an ore port, so she didn't _need_ Laura's sheep. And she knew it would probably be a waste, as LaFontaine had just gotten rid of half their hand. But she really wanted to see Laura's face scrunched up in anger. It was pretty much making her night. So she picked up her development card and flipped it over in front of her, showing everyone that it was a monopoly card.

"I'll take everyone's sheep. Thank you very much." Carmilla crowed.

Laf just gave her a shrug, but Perry surprisingly slid two over to her. Bonus! She turned towards Laura, but, instead of the furrowed brow and tight frown she had expected, Laura had a calm expression on her face. However, her restless leg gave away her frustration.

Carmilla held out her hand expectantly. Laura locked eyes with her as she passed the sheep over.

"You're going down." Laura said, not quite under her breath.

Carmilla decided not to even dignify that with a response. She built a settlement, picked up a development card and slid the dice over to Laura.

It turned out that Laura was true to her word. She rolled an 8, resulting in Laf and Perry getting one brick and two, respectively, and Laura getting two wood. Laura then flipped over her own monopoly card, taking the bricks for herself. She proceeded to build three roads, blocking off Carmilla's newest settlement. Then, on her next turn, she flipped over a road building card, building more roads and effectively trapping Carmilla. Perry, without any real competition, quickly ended up the victor.

"Alright kids. That's enough fun for me." Carmilla said, putting her pieces back in their bag.

"Yeah." Laura added, fighting a yawn. "Me too."

"You aren't driving home. Right, Carmilla?" Perry asked.

"No, Raggedy Ann." Carmilla answered. "I'm busing it both ways."

"Uh, I can drive you." Laura said. "You know. Save you some money. Not that you need to or anything. Plus, the bus isn't the safest at night. I mean, you can probably handle yourself. Oh! I didn't mean that in a bad way... Anyway if I give you a ride you won't have to wait and..."

Carmilla kept silent, just looking at Laura. She decided to see how long the motor mouth could last. And how red her face could get. She never realized how many shades of red existed.

"I'm sure Carmilla would appreciate a ride, Laura." Perry interrupted, handing Laura the remaining brownies in a container.

"Yeah, why not." Carmilla said, putting on her jacket. "As long as you promise not to go all kamikaze again."

"Deal." Laura attempted to reply stoically, but failed to keep a straight face.

Carmilla was following the shorter girl out the door after they said their goodbyes when LaFontaine gave a tug on her elbow.

"Seriously, dude. You can't just let her go on like that. She will pass out. I've seen it." Laf said.

"Don't _Dude_ me! Who am I? Kirsch?" Carmilla replied, only half joking.

"Alright, alright." Laf said, holding up their hands in surrender. "I'll see you Monday."

"Yeah, later." Carmilla responded as she hurried to catch up to Laura who was holding the elevator.

"What's the hold up?" Laura asked.

"Laf just wanted to make sure I knew you needed oxygen to live." Carmilla quipped.

"Oh." Laura responded, giving a small laugh as she pressed the button for the lobby.

The ride down and subsequent walk to Laura's car was silent, each woman lost in her own thoughts. At least, that was where Carmilla was. She knew it would be a few hours still until Elsie came home. She wasn't sure if she was happy or sad about it. Did she need to be one or the other?

The over-produced garbage booming out of Laura's car speakers brought her back to reality.

"Ugh. Can you turn it down or change the station or something?" Carmilla griped.

"Sorry." Laura said as she brought the volume down to a near acceptable level. "I was really rocking out on the way up here. Where do you live?"

Carmilla decided to let the "rocking out" comment slide and gave Laura her address.

"So, how do you know Elsie?" Carmilla asked.

"Oh, she comes by the store like twice a week. At least." Laura answered.

"The store?" Carmilla questioned.

"Yeah. Hollis Hardware." Laura said, somehow half proud and half ashamed.

"Hmm. Oh! You're Sherman's daughter." Carmilla said, putting the pieces together a bit slower due to the alcohol.

"You know my dad?" Laura asked incredulously.

"Yeah. He's the one who recommended I restore the house instead of renovating it." Carmilla explained.

"Huh." Laura said, her tongue in her cheek as she was deep in thought.

"This is me. Green house up there on the left." Carmilla said.

Laura pulled into the driveway and parked her car.

"Well, nice meeting you!" Laura said. "See you next week."

"Same." Carmilla replied as she stepped out of the car and closed the door.

Carmilla noticed that Laura waited until she was inside before driving away, which was somewhat sweet and kind of nauseating.

As Carmilla washed her face and got ready for bed, she thought back on her evening. When she had first met Laura she was sure she wasn't going to like her. With the staring and the stammering and being overly sweet and bubbly. But, as the night went on, it turned out that she had a little bite in her after all. Although, she was still ridiculously easy to rile up. But that was fun in its own way.

She wasn't sure why, but Carmilla wasn't having nearly as hard of a time falling asleep as she had recently. It was probably the booze. Yeah, that was definitely it. The booze.

 


	3. Murder Most Foul

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clue, Cake, and a Crush

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, longest chapter so far. I'm unsure about AO3's editing notifications, but just in case you're wondering I went back and edited the first two chapters as I had been forgetting the capital F in LaFontaine. 
> 
> For those of you not from North America, Clue is just Cluedo.
> 
> Hopefully the next chapter will be up quicker. I have part of it written already.
> 
> Thanks for reading!

**\- Perry -**

Perry was having a very difficult time concentrating on the murder she was trying to solve. She usually took impeccable notes, but looking down at her pad, all she saw was a convoluted mess. Things crossed out. Arrows pointing all over, sometimes looping back on themselves. She had determined that it was because of the seating arrangement. She couldn't focus when her line of sight put her in perfect view of another homicide. She had no problem solving this one, as it was ongoing.

It was Carmilla.

In the kitchen.

Murdering a cake.

Carmilla had insisted they hold the gathering at her house, as she said she had some baking to do and didn't want to risk burning down Laf and Perry's apartment building. The baking was for Elsie's birthday cake. So she had invited everyone over. Even Kirsch and Danny were able to make it. She sat them down, got everyone a drink, and placed some board games on the table, saying that she would join once she finished.

Then the horror began for Perry. She had tried to help. She wasn't one to stand by while witnessing a crime. But Carmilla would have none of it. Carmilla wanted to do it all by herself; wanted it to be special. And so Perry was forced to sit there and watch.

It was absolute torture.

She cringed when the batter was over-beaten. She whimpered when Carmilla poured said batter into an _ungreased_ pan. Which was then thrown into the oven. The _cold_ oven. Fortunately the oven was hidden behind the fridge, so Perry had a reprieve while it baked, and Carmilla joined everyone at the table where the first game of Clue was still in action.

Perry was hopelessly behind in the game. She looked around the table to try to judge how the other players were doing. Danny was frowning at her own notes, so she wasn't alone in that. Laura looked bored. Or maybe she was just low on sugar. LaFontaine was attempting to hide how eager they were, but they were drumming their fingers, and Perry knew that meant they were excited. Kirsch had a big grin on his face, but that wasn't all that informative. It was plastered on there about 80 percent of the time.

"It's your turn, Perry." Danny said, breaking her train of thought.

"Oh, dear." Perry said. She quickly decided to go for broke. "Well, I'm completely lost, so I'll just take a shot in the dark. I'll accuse... Colonel Mustard..."

LaFontaine's fingers immediately stopped their constant movement.

"...in the conservatory..." Perry continued.

LaFontaine poker face dissolved into a confused scowl as they started furiously skimming their notes.

"...with the revolver." Perry finished as she took the envelope from its place on the table.

Perry opened the envelope and shielded the others from looking. She then proceeded to lay out the cards in the order she had just named them. LaFontaine groaned and reached over to grab Perry's pad.

"'Completely lost' my ass." they growled. "Let's see... Perr, these are almost as bad as your grandma's notes on her banana bread recipe. How the hell did you figure it out?"

"I just guessed." Perry replied.

"You're so damn lucky." Laf said.

"I know, Love." Perry said as she placed her hand over LaFontaine's and held their gaze.

After a little too much time had passed Laura cleared her throat.

"Could we maybe play a different game next? One where I don't have to take notes?" Laura half asked, half pleaded.

"The other options are Monopoly, Risk, and Yahtzee." Danny said.

"Dude, you need some newer games." Kirsch said.

"Don't "dude" me, _Wilson_." Carmilla said.

"Low blow, dude." Kirsch said, oblivious to Carmilla's murder eyes after repeating the offending word.

"Maybe we should get Carmilla some games for Christmas, Perr?" Laf said, trying to stop any potential violence.

"Christmas! We should do Secret Santa!" Perry exclaimed.

Perry immediately tore a fresh page from her notepad and starting to further tear it into six pieces.

"Perry! It's not even Halloween." Laf said.

"Who knows when all six of us will be available again?" Perry said. "Kirsch, may I borrow your hat?"

Kirsch handed his hat over to Perry, as Laura suddenly grabbed for her phone.

"Wait!" Laura said. "I need to add you three on Facebook." She gestured to Carmilla, Danny, and Kirsch.

"Not that I don't want to be your 'friend', Laura. But what's the rush?" Danny asked.

"Odds are that I'm going to draw one of your names. And we just met. I'll probably need to do some 'research' to pick a good gift. And if I add all three of you, it'll still be a secret. And one of you might draw my name too. Besides, we're all going to be friends soon enough." Laura said, a smile resting on her face as she finished her mini rant.

"Makes sense." Kirsch said nodding sagely while taking out his phone to accept the incoming friend request.

After a couple of minutes Perry was ready.

"Okay, now that Laura is primed for her Facebook stalking..." Perry said as she gave Laura a teasing smile. "Take a name, look at it, and pass the hat around. If you get your own name, put it back."

"Also, you and Laf aren't allowed to pick each other." Laura added. "Otherwise it's boring."

"And conveniently gives you better odds at receiving sugary goodness for your gift." Carmilla said.

"...That too." Laura conceded, failing at holding back her blush.

Perry took a paper and unfolded it. She had gotten Kirsch. She handed the hat over to Carmilla. As Carmilla took out her paper and passed the hat along, the timer on the oven buzzed. Carmilla slipped the paper into her pocket as she headed over to the kitchen.

"You better not have your own name, Karnstein." Danny said as she picked out a name.

"Not really a smart move to antagonize someone who may have control over your gift, Xena." Carmilla replied as she opened the oven door.

Perry followed the hat around as everyone picked out their name. No one had put one back yet, so Perry wasn't able to get a clue about who had whom. A loud thump brought her attention to the kitchen where Carmilla had slammed the pan down on top of a large cutting board. As Carmilla pulled the pan back up, the cake came into view. Miraculously, it looked salvageable. Looks-wise anyway. Perry didn't want to think about how the cake might taste. She forced her attention back to the drawing until Kirsch pulled out the last name and stuck his hat back on his head. It was then that she saw the straw that broke the camel's back.

Carmilla had gotten a can of frosting from the fridge, and had a knife in her hand. Perry pushed her chair back and stood up in one motion.

"No!" Perry yelled.

"Perr?" Laf asked, concern clear in their voice as Perry started marching over to Carmilla.

"I have sat there, like you asked, and kept my mouth shut. But no more! This will not be borne." Perry declared as she took the knife and can from a startled Carmilla. "You will _not_ use cold icing on a hot cake. Do you hear me, Carmilla Karnstein?" She pointed to the cake with the knife. "You will let that cake cool." She shook the can of frosting in her hand. "You will let the icing get to room temperature. And then, and not one minute before, you will use a spatula to ice the cake. Not a butter knife!" She said as she tossed the offending utensil into the sink. "Have I made myself clear?"

Carmilla, eyes wide with shock and fear, simply nodded, unable to speak.

Perry was trying to get her breathing under control when she felt LaFontaine gently pry the can out of her hand and walk her towards the back deck.

"Okay, Perr. Let's just get some air, alright?" Laf said.

Perry allowed herself to be guided through the open sliding door as the thudding in her ears slowly gave way. The last thing she heard before the door closed was Kirsch.

"So... Yahtzee?"

**\- Elsie -**

When Elsie had woken up and saw that she had twenty-some notifications and texts, she groaned.

"Fuck."

It was 2:00 in the afternoon before she dragged herself out of bed. As she trudged into the bathroom and turned on the light, she found herself face-to-face with a sticky note.

_Happy Birthday! Don't go peeking at a certain something in the fridge. See you tonight!_

_I Love You, Carmilla_

Of course Carmilla would pick today to start trying. Okay, that wasn't fair. She should be happy that she was trying. It just happened that today was the worst day to pick.

But that was entirely Elsie's fault. She had never told Carmilla that the worst day of her life had also been her birthday. God knows why. She had told her everything else about that horrific moment in her life. She had just casually omitted that she was the kind of idiot who had insisted that her wedding be scheduled on her birthday. After all, she had wanted it to be the best day of her life. She hadn't considered that if things went south she would tarnish the day forever.

Elsie gently removed the note and folded it in half, placing it into the pocket of her robe. It would only be a few hours until Carmilla got off work. She decided to enjoy the solitude until she was forced to face that it was her birthday.

A little over three hours later, Elsie was waiting for Carmilla in the black and white dress she knew Carmilla liked. She figured, if Carmilla was finally going to put in some effort, so would she.

It went smoothly enough for the first little while. They had a kiss, a _real_ kiss, at the door. Carmilla had gotten them takeout from Elsie's favourite restaurant, the Anglerfish. The cake wasn't _terrible_. A little dense, but not bad. She just made sure not to have a big piece. And Elsie did love her present. Carmilla had gotten her a wet-suit and scuba lessons. Elsie had always wanted to learn, but never got around to it. Elsie then led Carmilla into the bedroom, wanting to show her how grateful she was.

She was in the process of unbuttoning Carmilla's pants when things started to go downhill.

"Wait. Wait." Carmilla said as she tried to slow down Elsie's oral attack on her neck. "I had more birthday stuff planned."

"Carmilla," Elsie replied, growing frustrated in multiple ways. "so do I. And it requires both of us being in our _birthday_ suits."

Elsie put on her best seduction eyes and voice as she brought her hair up and turned so her back was to Carmilla, but she kept their eyes locked.

"Now, unzip me." Elsie purred.

Elsie watched as Carmilla carefully did as she was told, making sure not to get the zipper caught on any hair of fabric. She then stepped out of the dress, revealing her lack of underwear.

"Your turn." Elsie said, moving to help Carmilla out of her clothes.

"Elsie..." Carmilla started.

Elsie knew that tone. It was relatively new, but she had gotten very sick of it, very quickly.

"Carmilla." Elsie said as she slid her hand to Carmilla's cheek. "It's my birthday. Don't make me beg."

Elsie hated playing that card. And she knew she _was_ begging, despite her words. But she _needed_ this. And she hoped that it would help get Carmilla back to the Carmilla that Elsie knew. The one from before.

Carmilla nodded, and Elsie drew her in to a kiss. Once Carmilla was out of her clothes, her movements became less robotic. Her hand cupped Elsie's breast of her own volition. As the two fell onto the bed, they became increasingly lost in the moment. Elsie's hands tightening in Carmilla's hair as she sucked at her nipple. Carmilla letting out a deep moan when Elsie slid a finger along her folds. Minutes felt like hours as the two women teased each other to dizzying heights of arousal. Elsie was almost at her breaking point, about to push Carmilla on her back and slide down to finally taste her, when it happened.

"I love you." Carmilla panted out.

It was as though time had frozen. Neither woman moved. The sounds of their laboured breathing the only sign of life.

Elsie was still torn between ignoring and acknowledging the words when Carmilla gently guided her to lay down.

"Carmilla..." Elsie began.

"Just let me... let me make you feel good. It's your birthday." Carmilla interrupted her with a sad smile.

And Elsie, not wanting to fight, especially not tonight, closed her eyes and gave Carmilla a slight nod.

She settled back and tried to get comfortable as Carmilla went on autopilot. They knew each others bodies almost as well as their own by now. Carmilla was hitting all the right buttons, but Elsie could tell she wasn't putting any passion into it. She went about it like it was work.

Elsie resolved to stop thinking and just focus on the pleasure her body was receiving.

After all, she had had worst birthdays.

**\- Laura -**

Laura was proud of herself. She had been able to hold off on stalking her new friends for four days. But there were only so many Wayhaught fics she could re-read before her curiosity got the better of her. Besides, it would be semi-productive stalking. She had drawn Carmilla's name for Secret Santa after all.

She started with Kirsch. It was about what she expected. Posts of him working out. Some about his availability for training sessions and classes at the gym where both he and Danny worked as trainers. There were some cute ones of his football kids practicing. Nothing especially revealing. Kirsch was an open book, what you see is what you get. And what you got was a goofy, well-meaning, man-child trying to make as many "Bros" as he could.

As she was browsing through his wall, Laura got a notification that she was invited to an event. She opened it and found herself invited to Danny's birthday celebration next weekend. Laura put herself down as attending, and then proceeded to Danny's page. Her wall had three categories. She, like Kirsch, posted her training availability. She also posted a fair bit about her Summer Society, which looked like some sort of Big Sister meets athletics organization.

Danny's third category of posts was a little surprising. It turned out that Danny was a bit of a partier. There were quite a few posts of her in bars and clubs with a group of people. Laura wondered just how _festive_ Danny's birthday was going to be.

When she tired of seeing pictures of Danny downing shots, Laura clicked over to her final stalking victim, Carmilla.

Carmilla didn't post very much. It was mostly updates on her house restoration, some outings with Elsie, and the occasional rant about dumb customers at work. Not much to work with for Secret Santa. Her wall only went back a little over two years. Her first post was about how Elsie had finally annoyed her into joining Facebook.

Laura decided to send Elsie a friend request too. They knew each other well enough. And she might have some posts that could actually help with the "research".

On a desperate hunt for _something_ she could use to spark a gift idea, Laura started looking through Carmilla's profile photos. She was only in about half of them, the rest being artsy shots of landscapes at night and constellations. Two of the photos had caused her to stop her scrolling.

The first was of Carmilla in a mirror. She actually wasn't wearing all black for once. She had a pink and white tank top on, and the camera was off to one side so the focus was of Carmilla's reflection. She had her hand up as she was putting her hair behind her ear, her eyes focused down so she wasn't looking at the camera or herself. A small smile was on her face. It was an actual smile, not the self-satisfied smirk that was usually there. Carmilla looked shy and vulnerable; things she had never been in Laura's interactions with her so far. The photo had a very intimate feel to it. Laura felt like she was intruding on something private, even though it had been put up as a profile picture.

Laura knew that Carmilla was attractive. Beautiful, even. She wasn't blind. It was just that she hadn't really taken the time to notice it, for whatever reason. But now, with the photo grabbing her attention and forcing her to look, without the stigma of staring at a real live person, she found herself in awe. Carmilla was _gorgeous_.

The second photo was one of Carmilla and a guy. The man had the same hair and eyes as Carmilla, so Laura guessed it was a relative of some sort. Maybe a brother. Carmilla had her arm around his waist, and he was holding on to her shoulder.

What had grabbed Laura's attention was something she had never seen before.

It was Carmilla.

Laughing.

The two of them were both laughing hysterically, holding onto each other for support. Carmilla looked so carefree, so full of joy. Laura wondered what had caused the euphoria that she was now seeing. What might be the trick to making that face appear again? She suddenly, desperately wanted to know. She wanted to know what Carmilla's laugh sounded like. To Laura, this version of her was even more beautiful than the mirror one.

As she got to the end of the photo set, Laura closed her browser and sat back in her chair. After a minute of two of self-reflection, Laura realized that her thoughts and feelings about Carmilla weren't exactly platonic. She had to admit to herself that she had a crush.

On Carmilla.

Who had a girlfriend.

"Shit."


	4. Rashomon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One night, six perspectives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this took longer than I had hoped. But I saw the opportunity to try something I had wanted to do for a while, so I took it. Here's my 5000 word apology.

**\- Danny -**

"Time for Shot Roulette!" SJ yelled.

Danny would have rolled her eyes, were she not already drunk. The beloved birthday game of the Summer Society ladies, Shot Roulette was a remnant from some sorority way back when. But now it was _tradition_ , and she'd only lost twice over the years, so she put up with it.

The game was played on a modified table, likely built by some overeager, horny engineering student trying to get into a sister's pants. There were twelve shallow holes spaced evenly around the table for the shot glasses. When the table was spun, it was always smooth, never fast enough to spill any precious alcohol.

There was only one way to win Shot Roulette: Don't take the Bullet. The Bullet being a special brand of moonshine that Natalie received twice a year. She would never tell where it came from, not even if she took the Bullet herself. The Bullet was _strong_ , and usually resulted in time travel for whoever took it.

It was probably an irresponsible game, but Danny had spent the first two decades of her life being nothing but responsible. After college, she felt like she hadn't really experienced it, it had just passed her by. So she had decided that she was going to _enjoy_ her twenties.

So here Danny was with a one in six chance of taking the Bullet, as tradition dictated that the birthday girl had to play with whomever she had personally invited to the party. Laura was the only newbie, the rest of them had been there last year.

Danny watched as Sarah Jane spun the table, the five tequila shots indistinguishable from the Bullet. The table slowed, and with a final click, stopped. Danny, never one to delay the inevitable, took the shot.

It was tequila.

Another victory for Lawrence.

She really didn't like to lose.

===

"Sorry. One drink an hour is all my tiny body can handle." Laura said.

Danny had just offered Laura another shot. Danny had even picked something fruity because the shorter woman had complained about the aftertaste of the tequila.

"Don't mind if I do." Carmilla said, snagging the shot from Danny's hand.

Danny shrugged, clinked her own shot glass against Carmilla's, and poured it down her throat. It tasted like mangoes, and was overly sweet.

===

Danny was enjoying her buzz and dancing her face off when she felt a tug on her arm. She turned to find LaFontaine, who gestured to join them in the almost deserted kitchen.

"What's up?" she asked.

"Is there a bathroom upstairs? The line is super long and Perry is in a bad way." they said.

"Yeah, you can use the one connected to my room. Last door on the left. Just keep quiet about it." she said.

"Awesome! Thanks Lawrence. Oh, before I forget, Happy Birthday." they said, reaching into their pocket and discreetly putting a small plastic bag of joints into Danny's hand.

"Thanks!" she replied, also thanking herself for wearing pants with pockets as she slipped them away. "Did you want to partake later?"

"Hah! Perry would kill me." they said with a smirk. "Later Lawrence."

Laf headed back into the sea of people dancing towards their fiancée.

===

Danny, being the courteous housemate that she was, had offered to share some of her present from Laf with the other girls. SJ declined in favour of grinding on Kirsch, which Danny couldn't comment on as she'd been in the same boat herself a couple of times. Natalie was passed out on a couch, so she was out. Which just left her and Mel in the kitchen, trying to keep blowing the smoke out the window so they would neither draw attention to themselves (so they wouldn't have to feel bad about not sharing) nor set off the smoke alarm.

Mel was halfway through her story about making a bong out of an apple when the alarm signaled that they had failed on both counts.

Danny ran what was left of the joint under the tap and told Mel to go and tell the dancers that it was a false alarm, so that no one panicked.

Danny then tossed it out the window and headed off in the opposite direction to do the same.

When she turned the corner she almost ran into Laura and Carmilla. Seeing that Laura was red faced and clearly panicking, Danny explained that everything would be fine. She didn't think that Laura was taking everything in, but Danny had to continue spreading the word.

She took off upstairs.

**\- Laf -**

"Time for Shot Roulette!" SJ hollered.

LaFontaine was curious about the table. Last year they had pre-gamed pretty hard, so it hadn't occurred to them to investigate how the table was made. It spun so smoothly. It didn't appear to matter how hard you pushed it, it just kept the same steady pace. They wondered if it had a set number of rotations somehow. Could the game be rigged? SJ had the shot glasses in their places before everyone had picked a spot, so she couldn't have chosen a victim that way. Once the party got going they would try to examine it.

Provided, of course, that they didn't take the Bullet.

The table slowed, and finally stopped. The tequila burned on the way down, but Laf was glad. Tequila meant that they might get to _experiment_!

===

"Sweetie, I want to go dance!" Perry pleaded.

"Just four more spins! That last one cut the remaining permutations in half." Laf said.

"LaFontaine!" Perry growled in that tone that said, with anyone else, she would have used their entire name. Laf knew it was time to concede.

"Until next time." they whispered to the table. They then turned to Perry and gave her their best apology eyes. "Can I put my notes in your purse? And then maybe I'll see about hijacking the bluetooth speaker to play a certain someone's favourite song?"

They could tell that Perry wanted to put up more of a fight, but she gave in fairly quickly. They were their best apology eyes.

"Here." she said, opening her purse. "And you probably shouldn't mess with the music. It's probably Danny's playlist or something. And it's her birthday."

"Right." They said, leading Perry towards the mass of bodies in the living room. Perry's words had reminded them about the contraband they needed to pass to the birthday girl.

===

LaFontaine raced down the stairs. Perry said she left her purse around here somewhere. Why hadn't she brought it up with her? There it was! Sitting under a chair.

As they got closer, they smelled something terrible, and LaFontaine was an expert in terrible smells. They had accidentally made the worst stink bomb in the history of the school district in grade ten. Their mother had gotten to know the superintendent on a first name basis as a result of the hearings. They still sent each other Christmas cards.

Laf steeled themselves and knelt in front of the chair. It was Perry's purse alright, filled with vomit. Making a quick decision, they gathered all their willpower, took the purse by the straps, and threw it in the nearest garbage. They covered the lid, took it outside, and said a silent prayer for their roulette table notes. Then they went back inside and headed upstairs. Luckily they had taken the bus over, and LaFontaine had a set of house keys in their pocket. Perry would be better off thinking her purse had been stolen.

She could never know.

**\- Kirsch -**

"Time for Shot Roulette!" the brunette hottie cheered.

Kirsch tried to remember her name as the table spun in front of him. It was just two letters. OK? DQ? ET? BJ? No! C'mon man. Get your head out of the gutter. That _was_ close though. CJ? DJ? SJ!

When the table stopped spinning, Kirsch made sure to flex his muscles as he took his shot. Hmm, tequila. So he didn't take the Bullet.

He decided to double down, so he winked at SJ when he slammed the shot glass down. To Kirsch's happy surprise, she smiled and winked back.

===

It turned out that SJ was a good dancer. And Kirsch wasn't even factoring in the grinding, because that wasn't really _dancing_. But she was really good at that too.

He didn't want to seem like he was all about that though. They had chatted over a couple of drinks after the roulette game, and Kirsch thought they really hit it off. Plus it turned out one of her cousin's played for Kirsch's football team. They connected over how goofy little Calvin was.

He was thinking about trying for a kiss when someone started repeatedly poking his elbow. He turned and found Laura struggling to keep Carmilla vertical.

"Kirsch! Carmilla is, like, beyond wasted. I need help getting her home." she said.

"Uh, sure little hottie. Just one second!" he said before turning back to his dancing partner. "Duty calls. Maybe you could come to Cal's game next weekend?"

"Yeah, it would be nice to have my aunt owe me a favour." SJ said right before she gave Kirsch a kiss on the cheek. "Go put those muscles to actual use."

===

Kirsch just focused on keeping Carmilla alive while Laura handled all the details of getting to Carmilla's house and letting Elsie in on the situation. Carmilla was still conscious, at least. And she must have been hungry too. She kept mumbling about creampuffs and cupcakes. Kirsch couldn't recall Carmilla ever really having a sweet tooth. Oh well, maybe it just came out when she was drunk.

===

Kirsch was waiting out on the front step when Laura came out of Carmilla's house. She sat down beside him silently while he played around on his phone.

"I called a cab when Elsie got here. They said it'd be about 20 minutes." he said.

When Laura didn't respond, he looked over at his new friend. Now that he didn't have to focus his attention on the raven haired rag doll, Kirsch could see that Laura was upset.

"What's up, L-Dawg?" he asked, gently nudging her with his shoulder.

Laura turned and met Kirsch's eyes. He could tell that Laura's brain was working overtime as she tried to deal with whatever was bothering her.

"It's..." Laura trailed off, then let out a frustrated breath. "Nevermind."

She turned back to face forward with her chin in her hands.

Kirsch had quickly become fond of the little hottie, and hated that she was suffering. He tried to think of a way to help. He took a folded piece of paper out of his wallet.

"When I was a kid I did the whole Zeta thing from the other side. Like playing instead of coaching." he said.

Laura half turned her head, and Kirsch took that as a sign to keep going.

"One year, before the season started we went to a camp about an hour away. Just normal team building stuff. We were there for a week. There was swimming, hiking, rope climbing, archery. You know, regular camp stuff." he continued.

Laura moved so that she was completely facing Kirsch, giving him her full attention.

"Anyway, the last night of the camp, they had everyone sit in a circle. We got a piece of paper and a pen. You wrote your name in the top left corner, and then you passed the paper to your right. And as the paper went around, everyone was supposed to write something nice about the person whose paper was in front of them." he said.

Kirsch carefully opened up the paper, now fragile after over a decade of being folded and unfolded.

"Most of it was just normal stuff. Talking about card games, or dumb nicknames. But there were a few that were really nice. Like, some of those guys only knew me for a week, but their comments were super thoughtful." he said.

Kirsch handed the paper over to Laura. She must have noticed it's worn state, as she was extremely gentle handling it.

"A couple of them, they just... what they wrote about me was what I really want people to think of me, deep down." he said.

Kirsch had to clear his throat before continuing.

"Anytime I'm feeling down, or shitty, I take that out and read it. It still makes me feel good. Or, better at least." he finished.

Kirsch figured that was enough, so he waited in silence as Laura examined the paper. She handed it back, and he carefully folded it back up and put it in his wallet. He hoped that by being the first to open up, it would let Laura be comfortable enough to do the same. And if it wasn't, then, that was okay too. He'd tried his best.

Laura let out a small sigh before she spoke.

"Carmilla kissed me." she said.

**\- Perry -**

"Time for Shot Roulette!" Sarah Jane exclaimed.

Perry was not one to drink to excess, so the prospect of taking the Bullet wasn't comforting. But Perry had to play, if only to lessen the odds of LaFontaine losing. She had enough trouble keeping their _experiments_ reasonable at the best of times. If LaFontaine was blackout drunk, there was no telling how things would go.

Last night, she had made them give her the key to their lab in the basement of the apartment building, just in case.

The table stopped, Perry took a deep breath, and took the shot. The tequila was quite unpleasant, along with the fact that LaFontaine's odds of losing increased.

Perry turned towards them, waiting to see the results.

"How do you think it works, Perr? Ball bearings?" they asked her as they moved the table back and forth.

Perry let out a sigh of relief.

===

LaFontaine mentioned Danny's washroom just in time. She really needed to go, and the line wasn't moving nearly fast enough. The couple casually left the line, and were trying to discreetly head upstairs.

"Hey guys!" Kirsch called out.

"Shh!" Perry hushed him.

"Sorry! Why are we whispering?" He asked.

"Don't worry about it." Laf said. "Did you need something?"

"Yeah! Do either of you guys have gum? Or mints?" he asked.

Perry decided that Kirsch was trustworthy enough, and she really needed to pee.

"Here!" she stammered, thrusting her purse into Kirsch's hands. "There might be some in there. Just leave it under that chair when you're done."

She pointed at the chair in question and grabbed LaFontaine's hand as she hustled up the stairs.

It was going to be a close call.

===

Perry was looking at Danny's photo wall while she waited for LaFontaine. She found a couple of Danny from when she worked at the rock climbing place. Perry remembered fondly when she and LaFontaine had met the fellow redhead there. Laf and Danny hadn't gotten off to a great start when Danny had misgendered them, but it had been a case of ignorance, not intolerance. Danny had comped their session, and LaFontaine had been gracious enough to accept the olive branch when it had been offered.

She was pulled out of her nostalgia by her betrothed wrapping their arms around her waist.

"I was thinking... instead of heading back to the party..." they said, kissing the spot of Perry's neck that they _knew_ would make her do anything.

Perry spun in their arms, facing them.

"Here? On her birthday? That is very poor guest etiquette, LaFontaine." she said, trying her best to remain firm.

"But you're so pretty..." they respond, going back to her neck _and_ pressing the spot just above her hip. They were really playing dirty.

Perry pushed them away from her. LaFontaine had a confused look, knowing that was usually the magic combination. Perry headed towards the open door, looked back over her shoulder towards Laf, and then closed it.

The grin on their face as she sauntered back towards them was one she hoped she never forgot.

===

LaFontaine was usually a poor multitasker, but for whatever reason that was never a problem when it came to Perry.

They had been doing such a good job with both their mouth and their hands that Perry hadn't noticed the loud beeping coming from downstairs. But both she and LaFontaine noticed when Danny came flying through the door.

"There's no fi- Jesus Christ!" Danny shouted as she covered her eyes as quickly as she could and spun around to face away from the couple.

Perry had been so startled that her limbs had shot out every which way. She had kicked LaFontaine and she had also knocked a bottle of nail polish onto the floor. Laf turned out to be fine but the bottle broke, spilling polish all over the floor.

"Oh, shoot! Sweetie, there's a bottle of that solvent you made me in my purse. Go get it!" Perry said, as LaFontaine was much closer to being dressed than she was.

Laf slipped their shirt back on and took off, giving a quick apology to Danny.

Perry reached for her bra as she addressed Danny.

"Sorry about that. We just got carried away. I guess being newly engaged is similar to being newlyweds?" she said, hoping it made sense and could possibly justify their behaviour.

"Did it have to be my bed Perry? I half expected it from Morticia last year, but you guys?" Danny replied, still not facing her.

"Happy Birthday..." Perry said sheepishly.

**\- Laura -**

"Time for Shot Roulette!" SJ shouted.

Laura blew some hair out of her face as she watched the table spin. She wasn't super pumped about being dragged into this. She was tiny. If she got stuck with the Bullet, it was going to be bad news. Ever since she acknowledged her crush on Carmilla, she couldn't get her our of her head. She'd spent the past few days trying to fill her brain with anything to distract herself. Books, TV, movies; nothing worked.

She daydreamed about Carmilla so badly at work that she only noticed she petted Gus for half an hour when her Dad said that he was glad that Laura was coming around. She was so startled that she had accidentally squeezed his tail, and any peace she had unintentionally stumbled into had disappeared when he hissed at her and took off into the back room.

Little bugger had totally peed on her shoes too. Her father said it was because Laura hadn't cleaned the litter box that morning, but she knew the truth.

But, however badly Laura's imagination had tortured her lately, it was nothing compared to reality. When she, Laf, and Perry had arrived at the party Carmilla was already there, looking as gorgeous as always, in leather pants.

Leather. Pants.

So if Laura couldn't control herself, she knew she was going to do or say something she was going to regret.

The table slowed to a stop, and Laura tossed the shot back.

Ugh. Tequila.

But not the Bullet!

Maybe tonight she would be able to keep things normal.

===

It was totally normal for friends to give each other nicknames. Carmilla gave everyone nicknames. It would be weird if she didn't give her nicknames too. All the ones she gave Laura just happened to be baked goods because Carmilla was not blind to Laura's enormous sweet tooth, and how she usually inhaled at least half of Perry's treats during game nights.

At least Laura was pretty sure that was what Carmilla had explained after Laura had _calmly_ inquired why Carmilla had called her "Cupcake".

And Laura most certainly did not fall deeper into her crush everytime Carmilla used one of the nicknames.

Crap.

===

It was also totally normal for friends to hold hands. That was what Laura told herself when Carmilla, after a few birthday shots with Danny that Laura had to decline, grabbed her hand and dragged her out to the dance floor.

Luckily Laura was able to keep herself sane by jumping into a rant about how unfair it was that guys couldn't hold hands without it being gay. She explained to Carmilla as they danced that she would know society was at a good point when two guys could walk anywhere holding hands and not have it necessarily be gay or romantic or anything.

But once the rant is over, it seemed that all Carmilla got out of that was that Laura wanted to hold hands whenever possible while they danced.

Double Crap.

===

It definitely was not normal, however, when Carmilla kissed Laura.

It was partially Laura's fault. When they had first arrived she had had a drink to calm her nerves. Then there was the tequila shot. She wasn't _drunk_ , but she sure wasn't sober either.

That's really the only explanation Laura had for what happened.

Carmilla had, once again, taken her by the hand as she pulled her across the house, looking for a vacant washroom. Carmilla had stumbled, and Laura had caught her before they both went down in a heap.

While Carmilla was thanking her, all Laura could notice was how out of place Carmilla's hair was. And then she watched in horror as, without her permission, her hand reached out, brushed Carmilla's hair out of her eyes, and tucked it behind her ear. From there, her traitorous hand started tracing along Carmilla's jaw, and then it happened.

Carmilla was kissing her.

It wasn't indecent, but it sure as hell wasn't chaste either. It was soft, slow, and delicious. Carmilla tasted like cinnamon and mango. Laura felt a tightness in her chest and a heat in her core. She felt like she was getting drunk off the kiss. Hell, she probably was.

Suddenly, Laura heard a loud beeping and pulled away from Carmilla.

Danny came rushing into the hallway, explaining that the smoke alarm went off, but there was no fire. Laura nodded dumbly, hoping like hell she wasn't blushing or giving any other sign of what had just happened. As Danny continued on her mission of calming everyone down, Laura debated herself about whether she would have been able to stop if the alarm hadn't gone off. Was she happy or sad that it had? And what about Carmilla?

Laura looked over to see the dark haired beauty slumped against the wall, glassy eyed with a dopey grin on her face. Then her face changed to panic, and she spun around and found an open purse to throw up in.

Crap Crap Crap.

===

Laura got Kirsch, called a cab, and miraculously got Carmilla to unlock her phone so Laura could text Elsie to explain everything.

Well, not everything.

Fuck.

===

Carmilla didn't throw up in the cab, thankfully. Laura got the door open as Kirsch helped Carmilla get to the washroom. Kirsch said he wasn't good with puke and excused himself. Laura pulled Carmilla's hair back into a ponytail and rubbed her back until Elsie got home.

Elsie thanked Laura for taking care of Carmilla, and assured the shorter blonde that she had it from there.

As Laura headed out to join Kirsch, she hoped that Elsie didn't notice how Laura couldn't look her in the eye.

===

"Carmilla kissed me." she said.

Kirsch just nodded at her to continue.

"And obviously she wasn't in control of herself, because she couldn't even stand up. So it's not like _Carmilla_ kissed me. She didn't choose to. It just sort of happened. And I don't think anyone saw. So I long as I keep my mouth shut..." Laura paused and gave Kirsch a half glare that she hoped conveyed that Kirsch wouldn't be telling anyone any of this. "...then it would be like it never happened and I would have zero impact on Elsie and Carmilla's relationship."

Laura waited anxiously as Kirsch sifted through Laura's word vomit.

"So, that's the Carmilla side of it. What about the Laura side?" Kirsch asked.

Laura was quickly finding out that Kirsch had a lot more depth to him than his social media would imply.

"I... Well..." Laura tried to figure out how to start. She knew once she got going she'd get to her point. Eventually.

"There was a woman I worked with back at my old job. She just checked a lot of my boxes, you know? Dark hair, glasses, tattoos. So I had a little crush. And I know I'm not the most subtle person in the world, so she could probably tell. She was married, but I guess she didn't mind the attention. And I'm pretty sure she thought I was cute too. So there was some casual flirting. And then after the office Christmas party, we ended up talking until like three in the morning. Nothing _happened_ , but I heard later that her husband wasn't thrilled that she was out super late without calling or texting. After that we just kind of kept a little distance. Then she got a job offer at a bigger paper and took it." Laura rambled.

Kirsch gave her a confused look but made a hand motion to keep going.

"My point is, I have a habit of falling for unavailable women." Laura stated.

"Ah." Kirsch said. "So the kiss..."

"Made it about 20 times worse." Laura finished.

The cab that Kirsch called for came into view and pulled into the driveway. The two piled into the back, and gave their respective addresses. They sat in silence for most of the ride. As they turned onto Laura's street, he spoke up.

"Uh, Laura?" he asked.

She hummed for him to continue.

"You can't control your feelings, but, you can control your actions." he said.

Laura turned the words over in her head a few times, but then decided to wait until she was sober to fully digest them. She paid for her share of the cab, then gave Kirsch a big hug before she got out of the car. The cab took off, and she headed inside.

Laura found her dad asleep in his recliner, clearly having failed at waiting up for her. She sighed and carefully covered him with a blanket. She grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, and headed up to her room, avoiding the creaks in the stairs.

Her last thoughts as she drifted off were of cinnamon and mangoes.

**\- Carmilla -**

"Time for Shot Roulette!" SJ cheered.

Carmilla had been through the experience last year. She had dodged the Bullet, but Elsie had not. It _had_ been a convenient, and truthful, excuse when the ginger giant had found her and Elsie fooling around on Danny's bed later on that night. Most definitely a party foul. Particularly on Lawrence's birthday.

Whatever. What was done, was done. This year she was just looking forward to drinking herself into a carefree state for a few hours.

The table stopped and Carmilla easily threw the shot back.

All she could taste was cinnamon. And then she felt...

Oh.

===

Carmilla woke up to a sore neck and a cool pillow. Wait, not a pillow. A toilet. Great.

Hygiene won out over comfort, and Carmilla moved away from the porcelain. Immediately, a wave of pain and nausea overcame her. She gave a couple of dry heaves, but nothing came out. Looked like she was empty.

She found a glass of water, a sleeve of crackers, and a couple of pills nearby. Ever so slowly, she downed the pills and half the water, then lowered herself to lie on the bathroom floor.

She reached over to the crackers, took one out and started nibbling on it.

She repeated the process until she fell asleep.

===

Carmilla woke up again to birds chirping. Damn birds.

Her nausea was gone, but the headache was just kicking into gear. She sat up, finished the rest of her water, then dragged herself the rest of the way up.

Elsie was sipping coffee at the table as she entered the kitchen.

"Hi." Elsie greeted her.

"Hey. Did I take the Bullet?" Carmilla asked, fairly certain but needing confirmation.

"Was it cinnamon?" Elsie returned.

Carmilla nodded her head, and immediately regretted it when her headache tripled in intensity.

"I'm afraid so. Welcome to the club. Do you remember anything?" Elsie asked?

Carmilla shook her head, already forgetting her previous lesson in pain management.

"Well, you can thank Laura and Kirsch for getting you home. How are you feeling?" Elsie asked.

"I'm hungover, and hungry, and tired, and angry, and depressed, and hungover, and I just want to be none of those things." Carmilla replied.

"Depressed?" Elsie repeated.

Fuck.

"Whatever." Carmilla said, moving her hand as though to wave the word out of existence. "Thanks for the water and pills and whatnot." she added as she got a mug out and poured herself some coffee.

"You can talk to me, you know." Elsie said.

"Yeah." Carmilla replied.

"Well, then why won't you?" Elsie asked.

"You know it hasn't been easy for me since..." Carmilla trailed off.

"Fuck, Carmilla." Elsie sighed. "You can say it, you know. I've been patient. I tried to just give you time and space, but we _need_ to talk. So I'm going to be the bad guy and pull off the goddamn bandaid. Your dad died. I get that you're still grieving, but you need to _talk_ about it. If you won't let me in, then at least let _someone_ in." Elsie said.

"I won't let you in?" Carmilla said incredulously. " _You're_ the one keeping _me_ out!"

"I keep trying to connect with you! You keep shutting me out! We've only had sex twice in the last three months, Carmilla. And last time was pity sex, on my birthday, that I had to guilt you into." Elsie retorted.

"You won't tell me you love me." Carmilla said, her voice cracking on the last two words.

Elsie sighed, trying to rein in her temper. "When we first got together we both agreed that this wasn't going to be serious. This was supposed to be fun. For both of us."

"It's been almost two fucking years, Elsie. What's your definition of serious?" Carmilla asked.

"I have explained to you why I can't go down that path again." Elsie replied.

"Oh, right! You're fucking broken inside after being left at the altar. Well, I'm sorry that my dad dying changed my fucking perspective and made me realize that I want to hold on to the people I care about and let them know that I love them. I'm such a fucking _bitch_! I'm not going to leave Elsie. I'm not _her_." Carmilla exploded.

"Exactly!" Elsie retorted.

The word hung there, neither woman wanting to acknowledge it, but also unable to ignore it. It rang out, without challenge nor amendment.

A couple of minutes later Carmilla finally broke the silence.

"So, you finally got us to talk. Are you happy now?" she asked.

"No." Elsie responded.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got a tumblr, since that seems to be the thing to do. And since AO3 doesn't do private messages. Come say hi, if you want. I don't really know what I'm doing.
> 
> crykksfics.tumblr.com


	5. Detour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And after the party it's ~~the hotel lobby~~ more angst? Really?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have way too much to say about this chapter. Just know that it's 100% Carmilla's fault.

******\- Laura -**

Laura sat at the counter at work, waiting for closing time. Her dad had left her to close up for some reason. She couldn't remember why. She sighed as she looked down at her sudoku puzzle that she was stuck on. Only five more minutes until she could shut off the lights, flip the sign and lock the door.

Which was why she was extremely annoyed at the bell ringing, signaling the door opening. Until, that was, she looked up to see who it was.

It was Carmilla. Laura took in the view as Carmilla turned to lock the door. She was dressed in an olive green blazer and skirt. She looked just like...

"Agent Carter?"

Carmilla gave her signature smirk as she came up to the counter and leaned in close to Laura.

"Do you like it, Cupcake?"

Laura nodded, suddenly incapable of speech.

"Good. I wanted to show you how...  _appreciative_  I am for helping me get home."

"No problem. Happy to help."

Carmilla straightened back up and strutted around the counter to Laura sitting on her stool. It was all Laura could do to turn and face Carmilla.

"I also wanted to clear up a misconception you might have."

"Oh?"

"Yes. I'm a  _much_  better kisser than that sub-par performance at the party would have you believe.

Once she mentioned of the kiss, Laura's gaze moved to Carmilla's mouth.

"Is that so?"

Carmilla's eyes darkened and glanced to Laura's lips.

"You don't believe me?"

Laura slipped off the stool, leaving very little room between the two of them.

"Laf taught me that real data trumps anecdotal evidence."

Carmilla slipped a hand into Laura's hair.

"Well then, it appears I'll have to demonstrate."

Carmilla pulled Laura into the kiss. It was fierce, hungry. Laura could feel Carmilla's  _need_. Especially when she bit Laura's lip. Hard.

Laura didn't mind.

The kiss deepened. Tongues battled for supremacy. Laura tried to give as good as she got until it felt like her lungs were going to explode.

As soon as Laura put a little separation between them to catch her breath, Carmilla's lips and teeth and tongue started working on her neck, while her hand slipped under Laura's shirt, roughly pawing at her breast. Laura moaned for more.

Carmilla's mouth slid from her neck to her ear.

"How was that, Cupcake?"

"I'm not sure." Laura said between shaky breaths. "Might need more evidence."

Carmilla moved back to lock eyes with Laura. 

"In that case, buckle up, Creampuff. Because I'm about to EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!"

Laura froze as the brunette emitted a loud robotic voice.

"What?! Carm?"

Carmilla's eyes started to roll back in her head.

"EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!"

Extremely disoriented, Laura closed her eyes and shook her head. When she opened them, she found herself in her bed.

"Holy Hufflepuff!"

It had been a dream. A frustratingly sexy dream. Laura started breathing deeply in an attempt to lessen the ache in her center. She grabbed her phone, which had been the reason she hadn't gotten to imaginary second base. Laura made a note to herself to change her text alert sound to something other than daleks. She opened her phone.

_Kirsch: Breakfast?_

Laura's hangover wasn't too bad, and she sure didn't feel like having to cook for herself.

_Laura: When and where?_

_Kirsch: Library about an hour?_

Laura checked the time, it was just after 11:00.

_Laura: Sounds good_

===

The Library was a small restaurant downtown. The building had housed the town's first library, until the space became too small for all the books. The library moved across town, and a restaurant opened in the building a couple of years later. The name stuck, and the rest was history.

Kirsch was already in a booth when Laura arrived. He was easy to spot, as most of the other patrons were seniors arriving from church. Laura noticed that Kirsch had already downed half of a glass of water as she sat down across from him.

"Did you already order?"

Kirsch offered his fist out to pound.

"Nah. Just got a drink. How are you feeling?"

Laura reluctantly completed the fist bump.

"I've been better."

The waitress, an older lady who Laura didn't recognize, poured some coffee for a very grateful Laura, then took their order. Kirsch got a western omelette and Laura asked for french toast with a bowl of fruit.

"Any word from  _Carmilla_?"

Laura choked on her coffee, her mind immediately going back to her dream. She was just about to give Kirsch a piece of her mind when her phone screamed at her.

"EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!"

"Damn it! I forgot to change the settings."

She opened her phone.

_Carmilla: Elsie said you took care of me. Thank you very much. Sorry your night got shortened because of me._

"That was her now." Laura said as she made sure the daleks were never heard from again.

"Did she mention anything about remembering..." Kirsch appeared to catch himself before mentioning the wrong word. "Last night?"

"No!" Laura's voice dropped into a conspiratorial tone. "And there was nothing worth remembering. Right?"

"Right!" Kirsch nodded emphatically.

Kirsch's phone lit up just as their food arrived. Laura cut her food mechanically while keeping her eyes locked on Kirsch as he looked at his phone, her mind racing.

"That was her."

Laura took a moment to savour her mango before responding.

"Let me see."

"Why?"

"I want to... compare."

"I don't know..." Kirsch said while Laura squirmed anxiously. "What are you doing this afternoon?"

"What?"

The sudden change in direction confused Laura.

"Usually Theo and I watch football Sunday afternoon, but he's out of town. If I let you read the message, you gotta watch football with me. We can bro down!" Kirsch's grin was wider than she'd ever seen it. Then his eyes got huge as an idea popped into his head. "And you have to cheer for the Seahawks with me!"

"Yeah, sure, fine. Go Seaheads!"

"Seahawks!"

"Whatever! Give me the phone."

Kirsch unlocked the phone and passed it to her.

_Scary Hottie: Thanks Beefcake. Owe you one._

Laura passed it back.

"That was not worth a whole afternoon."

"Not my problem." Kirsch's smile got softer. "Plus, it might take your mind off your lady troubles."

"What? Kirsch! Gross! Do  _not_  talk about my period. And my emotions are not dictated by my time of the month!"

"What? God! No! Not your  _lady_  troubles. Your troubles about  _a lady_."

"Oh. Oh God! I'm just gonna shut up and eat."

===

Once Laura was able to stop Kirsch from trying to explain what a two point conversion was, Laura realized she hadn't texted Carmilla back.

_Laura: Just glad you're OK :)_

**\- LaFontaine -**

Laf knew something was wrong as soon as they pulled into the parking lot Monday morning. Carmilla's car was already there, over an hour before she usually started work.

They looked into the driver's window and saw Carmilla with a book open in her lap. She could have been reading, if not for her eyes being shut. Laf gave a soft knock on the glass. When she didn't stir, they knocked harder. Carmilla startled and looked at Laf. She rolled down her window, confusion in her eyes.

"Who the fuck are you supposed to be?"

"Carm? It's me, Laf."

She rolled her eyes.

"I know that! What's with the wig and the stache?"

"I'm Einstein!"

Carmilla gave them a blank stare.

"Albert Einstein."

The brunette's expression didn't change.

"One of the fathers of modern physics!"

Carmilla let out a big sigh.

"Fine, I'll bite.  _Why?_ "

"Well, I was fine being Ron Weasley again but Perr said three years in a row was enough."

Laf could see the cogs slowly turning in her still sleepy mind.

"God damn it. It's Halloween, isn't it?"

"And you don't have a costume. Lucky for you I brought you something for just such an emergency."

LaFontaine took off their backpack and pulled out a black headband.

"Are those fucking cat ears?"

Laf held it out for her.

"Perceptive as always, Karnstein. You probably have time to run home and throw something else together if they're so offensive to you. Why are you here so early anyway?"

Carmilla took the headband and pulled down her visor and flipped open the mirror. She spent a few moments placing it to her satisfaction before turning back to Laf.

"Elsie and I broke up."

"Well, shit."

===

Laf was setting up the lab, while Carmilla lounged in their chair.

"Do you wanna talk about it."

"No."

Carmilla gave them her third best scathing look. Laf was immune after working with her for so long. Although, her best glare still worked about half the time. It was _powerful_.

"Carmilla..."

"It's really hard to take you seriously with that fucking monstrosity on your face."

Laf just looked at her until she gave in.

"We had a fight yesterday. It was a long time coming. Things were said that were painful, but ultimately necessary. Elsie decided she'd had enough. So that's that."

"Why don't you take a couple days and-"

"No!" Carmilla interrupted. "I can't... she's... she's moving out today."

Laf didn't know what to say. But apparently Carmilla was taking umbrage with their face.

"Don't give me that look. You know once she makes a decision she goes full throttle, so when I get home her key will be on the counter. I can't be there right now."

She was on a roll so Laf stayed quiet.

"Plus, I used the last of my days off when I went to my dad's funeral. And I'm not getting any rent now so I can't afford time off."

"Still, you should take some time to process it."

"I will. So this is your notice that I won't be at game night. I've got therapy scheduled all weekend with Mr. Jack Daniels."

"That's super healthy."

"I  _could_  be plastered right now. Pick your battles, Einstein."

Laf thought back to how Carmilla had dealt with her previous breakup. Loathe as they were to admit it, this  _was_  an improvement.

"Just call me if you need anything.  _Anything_."

"Got it. I'm gonna go raid the kitchen."

Laf watched her leave, then sighed and got back to work.

**\- Carmilla -**

Carmilla needed a distraction, and she had decided that working on her house was the solution. It would keep her mind busy, and tire her out enough that she could fall asleep quickly.

She hoped.

But she needed supplies for that so she had driven to the hardware store. For supplies.

 _Not_  because she was delaying her return home.

Carmilla pushed open the door and saw Laura at the counter. Shit. She had forgotten Laura worked here. She hoped she hadn't been too embarrassing while blacked out. Just play it cool, Karnstein.

Laura had looked up from her book when the bell jingled. Her eyes had gone wide and her face was redder than Carmilla had ever seen it. She was afraid Laura was going to burst an artery.

"Um, are you OK, Cupcake?"

"Yep. Cooler than cool."

"If you say so. If your face gets any redder I'm calling 9-1-1 though."

Laura started to take visibly deeper breaths, her face fading to a less dangerous shade of red

"Fair enough."

"Thanks again. For getting my drunk ass home."

Carmilla rubbed the back of her neck, hating that anyone had seen her in such a vulnerable state.

"No problem. Happy to help."

Laura's face moved closer to scarlet for some reason. The blonde quickly changed topics.

"Uh, what brings you by?"

"Just getting some stuff for the house."

"Right, right. Elsie picked up some hinges last week. Actually, I don't think I've seen you in here before. Is Elsie sick or something?"

Carmilla did her best to swallow all the feelings that attempted to spill out of her.

"Um, no. We... we broke up."

"Oh, shit. I'm sorry."

"Yeah, well. What are you gonna do?"

Carmilla was unable to maintain eye contact. She turned her head away.

"I'm just gonna go... get the stuff."

"Right. Yeah, OK. Cool. If you need any help..."

"Will do, Creampuff."

Carm walked down the aisle and took some deep breaths to calm herself. She just needed to focus on what she came here for. Paint and screws and a door hanging kit. Not sadness and pity and sympathy from a girl she barely knew.

Although thinking back, Carmilla wasn't certain that was what she had gotten from Laura.

She wandered down the aisles, gathering what she needed. The brunette came back to the front of the store a little more composed. She deposited everything in front of Laura.

"Find everything?"

"Yep."

Laura kept quiet during the transaction, probably sensing that Carmilla, who wasn't a great conversationalist to begin with, didn't want to talk.

"See you later, Cupcake."

"Bye  _Catmilla_."

Carm spun around slowly, sending the blonde a confused look.

Laura pointed to the top of her own head.

Carmilla, suddenly understanding, groaned and reached up to remove the cat ears she had forgotten about.

"I'm going to kill Einstein."

Laura gave Carmilla her own confused look.

"Don't worry about it. Good night, Laura."

"Night."

Carmilla walked out of the store.

**\- Laura -**

When Carmilla had told Laura about the breakup, she felt terrible. The blonde couldn't shake the feeling that she was responsible for Carmilla and Elsie breaking up. But she definitely wasn't unhappy that Carmilla was now single. And so she felt even worse that she could be happy about someone else's suffering.

Afterwards she had had a stomach ache for two days, until Kirsch's advice about not being able to control your feelings popped into her head and she forgave herself.

She still couldn't quite come to terms with  _Kirsch_  spouting wisdom. Particularly after he made her participate in the ritual Cleaning of the Helmet after his precious Seahawks lost. Laura had kindly suggested that she was bad luck, but Kirsch had been adamant that there simply "weren't enough bros". So she'd be joining in every Sunday that they played.

She couldn't say no after he hit her with those puppy dog eyes. And after he offered to pay for brunch, which was now  _tradition_ , despite this week being the first time it had occurred.

But, as she rode the elevator up to Laf and Perry's floor on Friday night, Laura resolved to distract herself with a fun evening with friends.

===

"What do you mean you don't want any brownies?"

Of course Laf would make a big deal about it.

"I just started a piece of gum." Laura held up the pack of cinnamon gum. "Maybe later."

Laf held the back of their hand against Laura's forehead.

"Are you feeling OK?"

Perry opened the fridge looking for something to help.

"If you're sick you should be at home resting, Laura."

"Guys! Stop." Laura lightly slapped Laf's hand away. "Alright, I  _may_  have had a low-key stomach ache all week. Can we just leave it be?"

"As long as you promise to see a doctor if it lasts through the weekend."

"OK Perry. I promise. Now what game am I going to kick your butts in this week?"

===

"Any day now, Hollis."

"Shut up Laf. I'm thinking."

This was Laura's first time playing Carcassonne. It was not going well. She got that the point was to put the tiles down to match sides with the other tiles already placed, but she was still a little iffy on how many points everything was worth. Laura took a sip of the ginger ale Perry had forced on her as she stalled for time.

"Fine. I'll put it here."

"No!" LaFontaine half-shouted. "Don't put that tile there!"

"Why not?" Laura asked.

"Because it ruins LaFontaine's plans, Sweetie. Nicely done."

"Perry..." Laf warned.

"You should place your meeple in the city instead of the road, Laura."

"Perr!"

Laura's phone started to ring. She was delighted to escape the impending domestic showdown.

Her mouth dropped open when she saw  _who_  was calling her.

**\- Carmilla -**

Carmilla was ready to strangle the bartender.

"Tell me again why I can't have another drink. Especially after jumping through your damn hoops."

"I just gave you one."

He pointed to the glass he had just set down in front of her.

"That is clearly water."

"Listen, lady. You're over your limit. Water is all you're getting for the rest of the night."

Carmilla noticed someone sit down on the stool beside her in her peripheral, but nothing was going to distract her from tearing a strip off the bartender.

"No, you listen, you patronizing asshole. This is a bar. I give you money in exchange for alcohol. It's not rocket science. It's not even a social science!"

Laf would have been so proud of her for that line. She needed to remember it for Monday.

"Carmilla."

The brunette turned and was surprised to see Laura next to her

"Cupcake? What are you doing here."

"You called me." She turned to the bartender. "I've got it from here."

"Thanks. Good luck."

Like hell Carmilla was going to let that douche get off that easily.

"Hey, where are you going? I'm not drunk enough!"

"Let him go."

"No way! The bartender said he'd give me a free drink if I called someone, I called Frankenstein, so he owes me one."

"I don't know about your deal with him, but you called me, not Laf."

Carmilla pulled out her phone and saw an outgoing call to Laura fifteen minutes ago.

"Huh. How'd that happen?"

"Laf and Laura are pretty close alphabetically. Of course that assumes you have our actual names in your phone."

"Of course I do."

"Why?"

Carmilla knew why she did it. She just couldn't quite recall at that moment.

"Reasons."

Laura chuckled.

"Keeping your air of mystery, got it. Come on, I'll drive you home."

"But I want to keep drinking."

Carmilla hated both the slight whine and slurring that came from her just then.

"Well they cut you off here. Don't you have alcohol at home?"

"But home reminds me of Elsie. All her stuff is gone. And so is she."

Why the hell did she have to tell Laura that?

"Also explains why you're at Vordenberg's instead of The Lustig."

"Duh."

Laura had the decency to look embarrassed.

"Right, sorry. We could go to Laf and Perry's."

"No!"

"Why not?"

"Don't want them to see me like this. One person is bad enough."

Laura blew out her breath in exasperation.

"Well unless you want to come to my house and watch hockey with my dad, I'm out of ideas for where you can drink."

Carmilla had an idea. She pulled out her phone and start typing.

"You weren't going to let me drink anyway."

She finished her message and sent it.

Laura smiled and gave her a soft shrug.

"You got me."

Carmilla phone buzzed a few times quickly. She read the messages and put her phone back in her pocket. She grabbed her coat and looked at Laura.

"Fine. Let's go."

"Where to?"

"That little lake that you can walk around."

"Corvae Pond?"

"Yeah, sure. I call shotgun."

===

"So, you come here often?"

"We need to work on your pickup lines, Cupcake."

The two women were sitting on a bench facing the pond. The moon reflecting on the surface of the water on the clear November night.

"Yeah,  _that's_  what I meant."

Carmilla decided to take pity on the girl next to her.

"The light pollution isn't terrible out here. I come out here sometimes for a little stargazing."

"I never took you for an astronomer."

"Oh, I have many hidden depths, Creampuff."

Carmilla's phone buzzed before she could see how her words affected the blonde. She read the message and prepared herself for a battle with Laura.

"So, I'm going to walk around the pond. You're going to sit here on this bench and wait for me to get back."

Laura, predictably, wasn't having it.

"What!? Carm, you're drunk. I'm not letting you potentially fall in and drown."

Carmilla wasn't thrilled with the nickname, but decided to focus on the more important matter.

"Look, Cupcake, I have a fantastic alcohol tolerance. Have you seen me stumble once tonight?"

Laura grudgingly shook her head.

"Exactly! That bartender was just covering his sexist ass because he wasn't used to someone like me drinking more than the big bad miners he's used to serving. And we aren't counting that fucking moonshine incident last week. That shit is instant blackout."

"So you don't remember anything?"

Laura looked away as she asked her question.

"No, and please keep any embarrassing anecdotes buried deep down where you keep your childhood secrets with Curly Sue."

"Will do."

"Good." Carmilla knocked her knee into Laura's, bringing the blonde's focus back on her. "Now, should I take it from that look on your face that you're still hell-bent on escorting me on my walk?"

"You did call me when you meant to call Laf. And didn't pick up on it when we talked on the phone."

"The bar was loud."

Laura wasn't buying that one either.

Carmilla sighed. "Fine. Then you're going to promise me that you will be silent until we get back to this bench."

Carmilla held out her pinky finger towards Laura.

"Didn't expect you to go for the pinky swear."

"Raggedy Ann may have mentioned how seriously you take childish measures. Are we doing this?"

Laura reached out her own pinky to complete the pact, locking eyes with Carmilla as she did. The brunette took in how solemn Laura's expression was. And how beautiful her eyes looked in the moonlight.

She cleared her throat.

"OK, Creampuff. Not another word."

The pair stood up and headed counter-clockwise along the path. When they reached another bench five minutes later, Carmilla sat down in the middle and motioned for Laura to squeeze down beside her. Carmilla noticed Laura give a slight shiver despite her large coat.

A couple of minutes later a guy in a hoodie came from the opposite direction and sat down beside Carmilla.

"Thought you were going to be alone."

Carmilla kept her eyes on the man as she reached into her pocket.

"She's cool."

They shook hands, Carmilla slipping him the money she had kept folded in her palm.

"Next bench, where your friend is sitting."

"See you. Come on, Cupcake."

Carmilla waited for Laura to join her in standing, then headed off towards said bench. Once they were out of view of man, Laura pulled on Carmilla's arm to stop her. True to her word, Laura didn't speak, but Carmilla could clearly interpret her expression as "Are you fucking kidding me?". Carmilla nodded her head to keep moving.

When they came to the designated bench, the brunette sat down and waited for Laura to join her. But Laura kept on walking. Carmilla, not looking forward to the confrontation she knew was coming, waited a few minutes before removing the package from under the bench and continuing.

As she turned the last corner of the path she saw Laura at their first bench, pacing back and forth and clearly talking to herself. As she approached she called out.

"OK. Let me have it."

"Did you seriously just make me drive you to a drug deal? And then have me tag along?"

"I tried to keep you out of it. I'm actually impressed you held your tongue."

Laura looked at her as though she couldn't believe what she heard.

"Of course I did! It was a pinky... you know what? Forget it! I'm driving you home and pretending this didn't happen."

Laura stomped off towards her car.

"Fine by me."

===

As they pulled up to Carmilla's house and parked. Carmilla could feel the anger coming off Laura. For some reason, she felt bad. Carmilla blamed the booze.

"Look, Creampuff..."

Laura kept her eyes ahead, ignoring her.

Carmilla sighed. "Laura."

Laura's eyes glanced over, but she quickly went back to 'ignoring' Carmilla.

"I just... I need it to sleep, OK? It's barely enough for a week. Plus it's going to be legalized soon enough. I wouldn't have brought you if it was anything serious."

Carmilla counted ten deep breaths from Laura before the blonde spoke.

"Go home, Carmilla."

"Come on, Cupcake-"

"No! God damn it! Take your  _fucking_  nicknames and GET OUT OF MY CAR!"

Carmilla, shocked into silence, did as Laura told her. As soon as the door closed, Laura sped off down the road. Carmilla watched numbly as the car turned the corner. She looked around and realized she was alone.

And after having spent months shoving everything down inside her, like a valve on an overloaded system, Carmilla couldn't hold back anymore. Tears started to run down her face. She dropped to her knees, loud ugly sobs wracked her body before escaping into the night. Everything hurt and there was nothing she could do.

The moon had moved halfway across the sky before she dragged herself inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why Carmilla? Why? This was legit supposed to end in domestic fluff!. Come say hi on tumblr.
> 
> **Due to circumstances, this will, unfortunately, remain unfinished. Sorry. This was a personal story for me that got closer to things than I anticipated. Thank you all for reading. This is a lovely community.


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